Here’s the tough blog. The good news is that the second pump fitted last Thursday worked. I woke up Friday morning to see that the chemicals had been released into my system through the night. But the side effects are really kicking in now. I felt really ill all Friday with bad diarrhoea so we didn’t go to the doctor’s Xmas party as planned. I simply wasn’t well enough.
However I was determined to see my niece Jane get married in Staffordshire on Saturday, and we did! It was a lovely wedding. Neil drove the whole way and the roads were empty. My other determined plan was to spend Sunday with Cara in London as it was her 30th birthday, so Neil drove us down to Islington after the wedding speeches and we arrived at Cara and Andrew’s canal side flat at about 10.30pm. Sunday was perfect, spending it with Cara and Andrew, and then we drove home to Devon. What a happy weekend.
But I’m struggling. My mouth is very sore and eating makes me feel sick. My weight has plummeted and I’m trying really hard to force myself to eat anything, simply to keep my weight up. It’s such a shame as all that wonderful progress I made recovering from the operation seems to be turning backwards on me. If I can’t get decent nutrition into me, my body will deteriorate, which is what I feel is happening. I can barely walk half a mile now as I’m quite weak. And with only half a stomach, the problem is much harder to deal with that other chemotherapy patients. It’s certainly a challenge!
Strangely I still feel quite OK. I guess because the process has started and I have only 3 more chemo sessions left. I’m looking forward to Xmas with family and no more big events to attend. I’ve decorated 2 Xmas trees today, so I’m really tired but content that it’s done. Next I have to figure out what I can eat for supper. I tried my cottage pie lunch time and ended up with diarrhoea, so I’m a bit stuck. I called the dietician in the hospital who’ll get back to me tomorrow. I’ve been googling and have printed out various meal ideas for me to refer to. I’m really hoping that my body will adjust a little and things will get easier. Someone mentioned that the first chemo is the worst. I hope so !!!! My hair hasn’t started falling out yet so that’s good news, although I know it will.
So that’s my update. I’ve promised to be completely honest, and I don’t foresee much change for a while. My next chemo session is straight after Xmas, so I’ll get on with trying to eat what I can and enjoy the Xmas festivities, even if it’s simply sitting in front of our cosy log burner watching the TV with my adorable husband. That’s definitely good enough for me.
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